Cootess 2 Fit Club: "I Will Destroy You!"

All you coots and cootesses participating in the Fairfield/HQ/Bookmobile Fit Club need to gird up your loins. With a combo of fierce psychological warfare and a iron will, The Cootess is coming to defeat you. Phase I of my brilliant plan: bulk up as much as possible before the initial weigh in so I have that much more weight to lose. Ask me what I had for lunch yesterday. Well I'll tell you anyway: a box of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese (Kraft Dinner to you Canadians out there), a Tostinos Triple Meat Pizza and four Pina Coladas ... and that was just lunch [insert maniacal laughter here]. As you can see, you will not win so you may as well give up now and pass me the pot o' cash. October, while you foolishly run 10Ks, The Cootess strategizes with loaded potato skins and double fried chicken doodles. Fish for Food, Norah, Effie, Mini, surrender now while you still have your dignity and a modicum of self-respect. Charles, Ron, I think you'll find humilliation tastes far more bitter than chocolate cake, so maybe you should just stick with the cake. The rest of you, prepare yourselves for DEFEAT 2.0!



Quotable Quote:

"Jazzercise is very 'cutting edge', staying on top of everything. I like being involved in something that's on top of everything - something that's number one!"

-- Cootess Christie Pavlovcak of Mentor, Ohio